Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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