Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
