Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
