So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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