so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
