The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
