so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
My pussy is not your playground.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
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Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
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Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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