I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.