Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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