smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
