Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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