are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize