talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
