I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize