Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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