she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize