Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
