Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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