If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize