i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
