508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
