you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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