Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize