He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
