How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
