therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
