I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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