yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
