So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch