We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
