Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
