Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
