awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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