i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
