They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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