You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
This couple is walking their pig around campus
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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