Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Randomize
