found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
