If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
