i permit you to call me
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
He felt like a one man threesome
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
