I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize