he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
