So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
then he tried to convert me to islam
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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