Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
