i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
