i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
