Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?

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  (415): Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust? http://tfl.nu/brsq
  Replies (30) Good night (1427) Bad night (2606)
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  (805): View more from California

  singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful

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  (805): singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful http://tfl.nu/6f81
  Replies (14) Good night (1211) Bad night (1922)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one

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  (405): so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one http://tfl.nu/mfz0
  Replies (46) Good night (991) Bad night (5076)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?

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  (440): my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that? http://tfl.nu/nj0k
  Replies (31) Good night (5589) Bad night (549)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night

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  (203): I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night http://tfl.nu/hkfs
  Replies (43) Good night (10229) Bad night (3132)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  ... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.

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  (352): ... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea. http://tfl.nu/mdap
  Replies (6) Good night (2382) Bad night (890)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.

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  (302): Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself. http://tfl.nu/ycey
  Replies (8) Good night (3533) Bad night (1064)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.

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  (617): did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now. http://tfl.nu/raep
  Replies (4) Good night (1638) Bad night (965)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.

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  (724): His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off. http://tfl.nu/q67j
  Replies (8) Good night (4037) Bad night (1117)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...

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  (716): I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom... http://tfl.nu/0ft1
  Replies (9) Good night (1081) Bad night (2616)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes

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  (406): i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes http://tfl.nu/smno
  Replies (3) Good night (1849) Bad night (761)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.

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  (305): It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you. http://tfl.nu/cw12
  Replies (26) Good night (5623) Bad night (1034)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.

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  (703): From russia with love. But also with chlamydia. http://tfl.nu/1l8f
  Replies (5) Good night (689) Bad night (2217)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina

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  (204): That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina http://tfl.nu/e6cy
  Replies (6) Good night (955) Bad night (399)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup

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  (403): i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup http://tfl.nu/p8ne
  Replies (3) Good night (667) Bad night (348)

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