But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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