Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Randomize
