barbara walters just said penis...
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
it was like eating out sand paper
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
