I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
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