Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
