i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize